Last night someone who was a very intregal part of my childhood died in a motorcycle accident related to alcohol. Everything is dissonant feeling and strange and I just hope every single person I love is okay right now and if anyone needs to be reminded how awesome they are I’m here because everyone should hear it just a little bit more often probably. The end.


how to cry at work without anyone noticing 

No this will have to be the title of biography.

(via barefootinadress)

I don’t hate the black hair but I also don’t love it.

I don’t hate the black hair but I also don’t love it.


me and you and our dogs all sleeping together on our king sized bed

(via iluvyoumorethancake)

Seriously die in a fucking fire

Seriously die in a fucking fire

(Source: livers, via supposeawildflower)

Time for a Risperdal and some sleep you crazy bitch. Jesus. Every day, for the rest of forever? Yikes. I’m going to need more survival skills. And a fucking Island.

"take up less space."
“be quieter.”
“express less.”
“calm down”

(things I will never do)


The varying wavelengths of colors


The varying wavelengths of colors

(Source: dinkum-thinkum, via creepysleepyqueer)

// I call this one “random mash up of facts from different sources about why I am the way I am and how it’s okay to get annoyed” a poem by Borderline Personality Disorder. //

Most Borderline Behavior Isn’t Deliberate 
Without education about BPD, family members take their family member’s behavior personally—especially if the BP is of the higher-functioning invisible type. This leads to much unnecessary suffering, because BPD behavior isn’t willful. Think of it this way: Why would anyone choose to be in situations that make them angry, unhappy, or otherwise in distress?

People with BPD cycle much more quickly, often several times a day.

At it’s core, this is an acute abandonment issue that begins in the first year of life. Inadequate bonding with the birth mother starts this ball rolling, and any/all painful deficits in nurturant care and attention thoughout childhood, perpetuate and reinforce this original trauma.

A cycle often begins in which people with BPD feel emotional pain, engage in impulsive behavior to relieve that pain, feel shame and guilt over their actions, feel emotional pain from the shame and guilt and then experience stronger urges to engage in impulsive behavior to relieve the new pain.[19]As time goes on, impulsive behavior may become an automatic response to emotional pain.[19]

Reasons for NSSI include expressing anger, self-punishment, generating normal feelings (often in response to dissociation), and distracting oneself from emotional pain or difficult circumstances.[15]In contrast, suicide attempts typically reflect a belief that others will be better off following the suicide

In addition, people with BPD may tend to dissociate, which can be thought of as an intense form of “zoning out”.[36]Dissociation often occurs in response to experiencing a painful event (or experiencing something that triggers the memory of a painful event). It involves the mind automatically redirecting attention away from that event, presumably to protect against experiencing intense emotion and unwanted behavioral impulses that such emotion might otherwise trigger.

Jesus christ I’d hate me too.